Saturday, January 16, 2010

This and that

I've been having very vivid dreams lately. A good portion of them involve running away from bad guys trying to steal my children. Sometimes it is Claire, sometimes it is unknown baby x. The other night, I dreamed that we were trapped in a high-rise hotel. The bad guys knew we were there, and we couldn't leave because they had all the exits blocked. At one point we tried to sneak out but couldn't, so we were trying to get back to the safe room. Me and my boy (played by Weston) got separated from the rest of the group. So I spent the rest of the dream running around trying to find my way. Hotels are like mazes sometimes. This one was. And I got told off by a group of old ladies for interrupting their TV show. So I woke up and was thinking about all these dreams that I have been having lately, and I realized that our upcoming son and any kids that follow him, are just as precious to me as Claire is. Or they will be. And I don't have to worry about it. That has been one of my main worries- that I love Claire so much that I won't be able to love any others. Or I won't want to love any others. So after I figured that out, I went back to sleep, the dream came back, and one of the bad guys was an undercover cop and he found me and got us to safety. I haven't had any dreams like that again. They are still vivid though. I don't remember last night's, I just remember it was very real.

Yesterday, when Claire got up from her nap, she would not let her stuffed puppy go for anything. She held it while I changed her diaper. It watched while she ate a snack. They watched some Muppet Show together. It was pretty cute. She kept hugging it and then giving it to me to hug. I was a little jealous of all the love that the puppy was getting to be honest. She has started randomly coming over and kissing me though, so I guess she is just becoming more loving in general. She still isn't a snuggler, but that's okay.


MommaKAS said...

A parent's heart is an amazing thing, in that there is always a bursting abundance of love for each and every child.

I know how you feel about the dreams. I had a recurring one where you and your sisters were swept away by a raging river and I couldn't do anything but run along the bank in panic. Sometimes, I managed to save you all. Sometimes, I could only save one or two. Sometimes, I could save none. It was a very creepy and real dream. I think it's just the deep-seated fear of not being able to protect your babies all the time that causes dreams like that.

Shannon said...

I always have the craziest dreams when I am pregnant too. Funny that Weston played your son. :) I think it's cute when kids get attached to a lovey. That usually happens for my kids when I take away the binki. They find something new to latch onto and comfort themselves.